You get the idea. Whatever I’m doing, I should be doing something else. Whoever I’m with, I should be with more – or I should be with someone else – or both at once. Whatever I’ve accomplished, it should have been better or faster.
I know it’s lunacy. I know it’s a hellish treadmill of my own invention. And I know, as Matt Hall says, that I shouldn’t “should” on myself.
It doesn’t make me fun to be around, sometimes.Â It makes compliments hard to take.Â It makes sitting still something I have to practice.
Heaven, to me, will be being enough.
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