An ex and I used to argue about going out all the time. He was baffled by the way that the big, loud, long social interactions that energized him, drained me.
Especially because I did – I do – enjoy them. I have a great time. But I’m worn out by the end. And if I’m already running low, it’s the last thing I want to do.
I always felt badly about that. I assumed I was a bit broken. Extroverted, but bad at it.
But the current issue of Psychology Today (which sounds geeky, but I swear, pick up an issue, it’s the best parts of a magazine without all the shilling for overpriced accessories) has an article about personality types – about how what you think of yourself is not necessarily how others think of you, and vice versa.
The thing that I loved best, though, was the sidebar on certain personality types that mentioned “the bubbly introvert”.
They described it as being lively and exuberant and cheerful and social, but “gasping for time” to yourself.
And for the first time ever, I feel like it’s okay to be like that. That it’s not a malfunction. It’s just the way that I am.
It’s an awfully nice feeling.
This is one of my favorite posts ever.
There was an article in The Atlantic several years ago — http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200303/rauch — that made me feel, for the first time, that someone really understood how I felt. That sidebar you linked to really completed the picture.