Mistaken Identity: 741-787

OMG SO MANY.

I’ll skim over the standard ones. Just know that:

• Emily, Curran and Savanna are doing well in their English 102 group work.
• Judi in Palm Beach Gardens owes Other Me money.
• Other Me is looking into Clinical Laboratory Science (although I would grouchily point out that if you can’t get your own email address right you should maybe focus your sights a little closer to home).
• Tim is sending yell-y religious forwards.
• Des is drinking Other Me’s wine.
• Central Texas College has a branch specifically for military deployed in Europe (which is cool), and Other Me works with them.
• Caroline, of the Jubilee Singers, continues to labor under the delusion that I am one of her British singers, neither part of which is accurate.
• Sandra has resigned as a residential care worker, none too happily.
• For some reason I find the sentence “I thought you were the Sarah Morgan that I worked with at the Takapuna Visitors Information Centre.” immoderately funny.
• Sad follw-up: New Zealand Other Me lost her job because the Takapunta Visitors Information Centre closed.
• Alamo Rent-a-Car in London really gets you when you rent one-way.
• Lydie sends her bisous for 2013.
• Liba’s cinnamon rolls look delicious.
• Other Mes are on Zorpia, IMVU, Life360, LinkedIn and Instagram.
• Other Mes are also busy spending time and money with the Middlesex Country Cricket Club, Step Up 3 at Wal-Mart, Disney, bridesmaid hair and makeup, on Sensa, Bible studies, the Santa’s Grotto at the Westfield (London) mall, trips to Turkey, wine, Vans, online-pharmacy painkillers, that “farmer” ad from the Super Bowl, Cardiff Metropolitan University, an iPhone 4 repair, librarian book talks, a really attractive new fire pit, Rebecca’s tea-in-the-park-themed 40th birthday party, and the future of the Woolwich Ferry.

I can’t begin to describe the detail with which Kristen planned a children’s party, and if I pasted the email the graphics and tables and sheer length would blow up my site. Suffice it to say that with the amount of glow-in-the-dark paraphernalia she ordered, the Winter Wonderland party (capturing the time-less magic of all things wintery, such as playing in the snow, sledging and wonderful winter animals such as Huskies and Reindeers (unfortunately, not real ones!)) must have glowed like Three Mile Island. DNA Kids is clearly an extremely thorough party-planning outfit.

* * * * *

I will not, due to HIPAA laws, my own sense of decorum, and an appreciation for your digestion, post details of Other Me’s recent stool sample. Let’s just all be pleased that all four tests came out negative. Yay?

* * * * *

Finally: WTF, Earl.

From: Earl
To: Me
Subject: Re: So, has it happened yet?
OMG!!! I am sooooo sorry Sarah! Looking at your e-mail address I realize I [REDACTED]. Thanks for letting me know so I can resend this note.
BTW, the other Sarah is [REDACTED]. We used to work together and have kept in touch. She got divorced about 3 1/2 years ago but hadn’t really dated at all til a few months ago. She met an older guy she really liked but sadly discovered he wasn’t able to be physically intimate. She was crushed, but last month met a younger guy (34 I think). She was so hopeful they would hit it off AND that he could help her finally end her five-year-plus “drought”. I’ll let you know what I find out.
Thanks for your understanding and help “Other Sarah”!
Earl

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From: Me
To: Earl
Subject: Re: So, has it happened yet?
Sorry, I think you’ve reached the wrong Sarah Morgan – I’m afraid I don’t know you!

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From: Earl
To: Other Me
Hey Good Lookin’! How’s life treating you?
Are you still dating that guy you met last month? Has he helped you end your frustrating drought yet? I’ve been rooting hard for you!
Drop me a note tonight and let me know.