Mistaken Identity: Episodes 934-946

Other Me(s) have recently been mistakenly using my email address for PayPal, the Apple Store, two unrelated new Gmail accounts, Domino’s Pizza (stuffed crust with pepperoni and pineapple, in case you’re curious), San Diego Gas & Electric, Beaverton Toyota Rental, and, oh yes, their new Ashley Madison account. 

About that last one. Ashley Madison is a social network for people to have affairs. Let’s not even go into how foul that premise is. Instead let’s discuss how Other Me A. used the wrong email address to create an Ashley Madison account, which she then B. populated with information saying that she was a 35-year-old muscular straight man. 

Theory One is that Other Me does not know how to fill out a profile. Given the email error, this is not an option to be ignored.

Theory Two is first of all more interesting, and second of all I don’t like to think that there’s someone that dumb with my name – so I believe it’s possible that Other Me went on Ashley Madison to cleverly smoke out the woman with whom she thinks her significant other is cheating on her.

However, considering that Other Me used OUR NAME on her profile, the pretending-to-be-a-man theory admittedly has holes. Other Me, whyever you are on a sneaky adulterer website, why would you use your real name? OUR real name? Wouldn’t anyone automatically choose a fake name??

I admit that, with this email, for the very first time, ever ever ever, I did something other than correct the misdirection. I went in and turned off Other Me’s account. (Ashley Madison charge to actually delete your account. They also charge if you want to actually converse with other cheaters. They may be, and are, utterly without morals, but they are not unaware of how to turn a profit.)

Fortunately, Pat, Gitanjali and Kim are all very nice and leave things on a cheerier note. 

* * *

From: Pat

Subject: Hello there

Hi Sarah.
Just this minute got in…got your message….hope this gets to you.
I was on the phone only yesterday evening talking to Audrey….and your name came up.
I was wondering how you were getting on, too.
How strange ….. but we do believe in coincidences don’t we.  So in a way I was not over surprised to hear your voice on the answer phone.
Speak again soon.
Much love Pat xxxxx

* * *

From: Gitanjali

Subject: Haapppppyyyyyy Independence Day :):):)

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Sarah!!
How are you? How’s Lani? I hope you’re all doing well!

I feel extremely delighted to write this e-mail to you considering how time has flown by sooooo fast. It’s unbelievable that it’s been more than a year of knowing you and Realityworks :) :) :)

My memories are still fresh of that long weekend which came last year so here’s wishing you a very very Happy Independence Day and a joyful weekend!!!

Hope you have a blast :) :) :)

* * *

From: Kim

Subject: Thank you!

Hello Sarah,

Just got back into town late last night. I just wanted to thank you very much for all the books and suggestions.
They all came in very handy. Especially the video link on potential scams. I did not offer to sign
the petition to help blind and deaf nuns at Notre Dame. “Thank God!” ……. I must say I understand why you LOVE Paris.

We had heard many people say it is “over rated.” I do not know what they could possilby be thinking.
The food, people and history were too amazing for words. The culture was a pleasure to experience.
In fact Vic and I are sad to be home. Connor is a history buff, and I think he was overwhelmed by all the city has
to offer. Molly is one for the arts so needless to say she was captivated. Unfortunately, we are all “foodies.”
Who could resist slow paced lunches and dinners with wine, champagne, and fine food? Needless to say I we all came
back a few pounds heavier.

We spent five nights in Paris and two nights at Versailles. It was so lovely. We are eager to plan our next summer trip to France.
Probably Paris, Versailles and Southern France. Would love to know if you have any tips for Southern France.

I would like to know when and where I could return your books to you?
I hope you are enjoying your summer.

Regards,
Kim