Sarah Morgan
In this first post from You Write the Title III, I write to Sac’s title, and offer you three thoughts on the audacity of mustaches.
Firstly. Mustaches are indeed an audacious choice. Primarily, I contend, because they fall into the same category as gladiator sandals. If you look good to begin with, you will look good in them. If, however, you do not look good, they will only make you look worse. You may hope that you look better than you think you do, and discover to your peril that your new choice does not suit you. For personal comfort, however, you may choose to eschew aesthetics and go with them anyway, and to hell with how you look. Audacious.
Secondarilously. I have a confession for you: I find Tom Selleck attractive to a degree that troubles even myself. Peculiar but true. Ever since the mid-90s when he played Monica’s boyfriend on Friends. Possibly even from the mid-80s when he was in (do not judge me) Three Men and a Baby. However, I have to admit that I don’t think it has anything to do with the mustache, audacious though it may be. It’s his voice. There’s something super-hot about his voice. So that’s not really about mustaches per se. It’s mustache-adjacent. But perhaps my admission counts as audacious?
Thirdishly and finilarily. I don’t really get the mustache Thing that is happening lately, and is definitely happening in a big, audacious way. Mustache pacifiers and stickers and straws and I’ve even seen pillows with giant mustaches on them. Much like the owl Thing. Owls are everywhere and so are mustaches. Why are they trendy now? They both have a 70s vibe. Is that why? Are we 1970s-nostalgic, at least as far as all things strigine or mustachial? (Strigine is a word and I am proud of myself for looking it up. Mustachial is a word as of right now.) Are avocado appliances and mustard carpets and rose-colored bathroom fixtures next? I hope not. Owls and mustaches I don’t get behind, but I can understand how they can have appeal. They’re kind of cutesy in an ironic way. Badly colored household goods I cannot support.
There you go. Three thoughts on the audacity of mustaches. May they serve you well.
I told you I’d write about anything.
I predict colored appliances are back in a big way — 5 years from now people will be sad on House Hunters when they see stainless steel.
And Tom Selleck — yes. 3 men and a baby. And should you have time or inclination – Hawaii 5-0.
“I find Tom Selleck attractive to a degree that troubles even myself” – literally just snorted in bed reading this!
haha! mustache-adjacent. love it. love this whole thing. special thanks to sac for inspiring this piece of brilliance :)