This was something I wrote back in June after reading a Momastery post which used the quote above.
I’m going through cancer treatment and you don’t really notice anything right away. My hair is thinning, I’ve got a scar crossing my neck, and my neck is stiff, but you don’t glance over at me and go OMG PATIENT. I’m not bald or emaciated or wheelchair-bound or anything awful like that. Which, thank God, thank God, I can’t say it enough, thank God. But it’s a very new sort of paradigm for me to be in and it’s really gotten me to think.
First of all, about how lucky I am. I’ve never had surgery before. So many people I know have done this a lot for all kinds of reasons on all kinds of body parts. You bastards are hardcore.
Second of all, about how much is going on with other people. I’m not always entirely up to scratch these days. And it’s frustrating. But there’s a very good reason. Thing is, it is a very effective method of making me realize that hey, guess what – this is probably the case for more people than not.
That jerk who changed lanes without signaling. That idiot who’s not listening to her screaming kid. That person who dropped the ball on that thing you need from them. That one who was rude. And also that person who was smiling and nice and great to you.
They’ve all got shit going on that you can’t even begin to fathom. Ex-spouses making their lives hell, kids worrying them like crazy, their own illnesses, and a pile of crap that would make you amazed that they got out of bed, let alone got to where they are at this point in the day when they’re currently getting on your nerves.
Now, let me be clear. It’s not your job to solve their problems, to be their therapist, to put up with them being rude or worse to you. But I think it IS our job to remember that they have lives full of crap just like we do. So maybe we can cool it on the cursing-out, or even just the eye-rolling, or even just the internal judging.